A Minimalist Survives the White Elephant Party

I bet you’re going to be invited to 1 or 98 White Elephant parties during the holidays. Work venue, spouse’s connections, kid’s playgroup parents’ party (they have those don’t they?) and/or the annual neighborhood party. Happily I can avoid all of these scenarios except the obligatory work shindig. And although I tend to approach this annual event with my heels dug in, I always end up having a good time. We have some characters on our staff and it’s fun to see their goofiness come out as things get rolling. It’s not so much the party I resist but the pressure to come up with some wonky gift. The adults in the crowd (technically we’re all adults there, but my inner 11-year-old makes an appearance as the party date draws near) realize this is all just for fun and not a competition. But deep down…way deep down we know it is. The  taxidermy-quality-psuedo-stuffed chicken dressed as Santa (true story) will always trump the he/she salt and pepper snowman set.

And then there is the quandary of the Minimalist’s rules: mine is that nothing new comes into my place. Although the furor of my purging has slowed, I still try to find overlooked items to get rid of – things that are blind to my eye just by their longterm presence.  

This year I realized that I could use the White Elephant ritual to my minimalist-inclined advantage – if I sifted deeper through the few remaining boxes that contain things I can’t quite let go of yet, I just might find something White Elephant-worthy. I’ve been hanging onto my huge college diploma, only because my mom had this framed for me and it looks fancy schmancy - in my closet. Brilliant! I thought. I’ll give that away! And it might increase in W.E. regifting value if it’s deemed adequate enough to be passed on. Then I got self-conscious thinking about my ancient, fancy, framed diploma getting tossed about, not knowing where it’s going to land and who’s going to get curious enough to start googling me and my info. But then they’d most likely just end up here and that loop would be closed. Naw. I’m hanging on to it for now. (But maybe you should give your framed diploma at your next party.)

Then I remembered a navy blue wool stadium blanket that I still have from high school when I was a member of a drill team. Now approaching retro status, this blanket has my alma mater’s name, officer rank and personal name monogrammed on it.  This is another mysterious thing I’ve kept all these years, certain I’d find some use for it. I did! I brought it to the party and it’s now in the hands of an appreciative co-worker, revived into usefulness.

If you’re in the midst of minimizing and have a lot of randomness hanging about (like your 2nd place softball trophies, the 8-track tapes, the macrame planters, the cloth door calendar from 1976, or the once-beloved chia pet), put the word out to your buds who are looking for gifts that you have plenty for them to choose from. This might be a fun way to rid yourself of ancient clutter and provide the perfect thrift-store quality W.E. gift for them.

And if you come across the Santa-clad stuffed chicken – hang on to it forever. You’ll never see one of those again!

Another Worm Inn Update

The Worm Inn will soon be under new ownership! This has happened pretty quickly and I’ll have more information later as things are solidified. The new owner is a vermicomposting Guru and passionate about his business. I feel very good about passing the reins to him. Thanks to everyone who has supported and purchased an Inn for your vermicomposting needs!

Worm Inn Update

The Worm Inns will soon be a collector’s item as the last batch of Inns has been made. I’m starting to focus on other projects and will not be constructing any more Inns after these are gone. 3 have sold in the last couple of days and I expect more orders for the holiday season. Sooo…get ‘em while they last!

Here is the official site – The Worm Inn, but just quickly – this is an indoor vermicomposting system – meaning food scraps are consumed by Red Wiggler worms, resulting in high quality fertilizer (worm poop). All the details are on the site, but let me know if you have any questions in the comments. Thanks!

Living As If

This is a follow-up to the posts “Life’s Too Short For Just One Path” – part 1 & part 2.

It’s exciting and liberating to consider all there is to do in life! The possibilities can be endless and even overwhelming if everything you wanted to do were listed. Sometimes that thought alone can serve as a stop – “there’s too much to do in the world I can’t even think about it! It’s easier to just stay here and keep doing what I’m doing.” And if that’s what you want, then you’ve arrived. You had a goal, intentional or not, and you’re doing it. Any change you make will shake up the routine.

But if you’re feeling the ennui of a bored soul, then take it as a sign that you are being called out. You’ve plateaued with whatever you’ve been doing and your intellect and creativity are stirring for the next challenge. That is such a great place to be. This is where your inspiration gets to come out to play. This is especially true if you believe your heart is ready for change but your circumstances are not. You get to live as if… as if the thing you want to do is already in process. And it is because you’re giving it attention – you’re thinking and dreaming and wondering. You’ve put the gears in motion but maybe you’re not quite ready to actually Go and Do. Because you’re a wise planner you may need to put some things in order. You are in Preparation mode. This is the part where you put your power, energy and activity into the foundation of your Plan before you push the button.

Everything you do from now on gets to be directed toward your Plan.

Make Your Plan. Or Plans – Write down all the different scenarios you envision. This is where you set yourself free and brainstorm all the ideas that flutter through your head. Nothing is too crazy. Just start writing it all down – you can rearrange and modify these later.

Save All Of Your Non-essential Cash - Essentials are: rent/mortgage, food, health insurance, Internet (maybe – see below). Buy nothing except food from now on. You have everything you need to live a satisfying life. You don’t need to upgrade anything. Food should just be groceries and your groceries should be mostly bulk – no, or as little as possible, packaged foods. You will save a lot of cash, eat better and produce less trash.

Be ruthless with what you cut out - do you really need two phones? Choose one, landline or cell and let the other go. Can you cancel the internet and get by in public places? Can you sell your car? If you live in an urban area with public transportation and/or own a bike you can. Most likely this will be your biggest source of easy savings. Cable, gym (and other) memberships and subscriptions are easy things to cut out.

Get Your Financial House In Order – Arrange things to be as streamlined and accessible as possible. Get this set up as if you were living your Plan. Consolidate accounts and know what you have where.

If you have debt – make it go away as fast as possible. Your Plan will give you new motivation for being very aggressive with this.

Consider Your Current Living Space – Would you sell it? Rent it out? Start thinking about the options that work to your advantage.

Purge Your Belongings - Unload everything you can. Sell as much as possible and put the earnings in a travel (or whatever your Plan is) only fund. Every item you have weighs you down. Just start the process as this might take longer than you expect. On the other hand, it might go quickly: I sold over $700 worth of stuff in 2 months. I keep looking for the next thing to go.

Gather Information Related To Your Plan – Find the blogs, search Google with different terms and phrases. Sleep on it then return to your search with new ideas.

Refine Your Relationships – Who gives you support with your dreams? Who is a drain and tells you that you can’t do it? Protect your plans from those who are not supportive and be cautious with those you think are.

All of these actions will keep your enthusiasm strong during the preparation stage. I have a large white board in my room where I write inspiring reminders. This helps when I start to cycle out of the motivation. Don’t worry about the cycles that happen. Your heart’s path will come back into focus more refined with each turn. Doubt is normal – don’t let this discourage you from pursuing what inspired you. The process of getting unstuck is an exciting journey. Let everything happen.

If in the end you decide not to follow through with your plan, nothing is lost. You’ve shifted the physical, financial and emotional order of your life and have created space for something new to enter.

The Blissful Reading of a Young Person’s Book

It’s a slow, chilly, beautiful Sunday afternoon and I am pulling myself out of a reverie to write this post. For the last 2 hours I’ve been immersed in the sweet, lost-in-a-good-book feeling of my junior high school years…

I am a 12-year-old girl living on the Texas prairie in 1899. It’s hot and dusty with the drought. I’m the middle child and only girl in a family of seven kids. I am insatiably curious, a stalwart observer and am dying to read Mr. Darwin’s book The Origin of Species which has created a raucous stir in town. My mother would die herself if she knew this and is more concerned that I not miss my piano practice and that I received an “unsatisfactory” for use of Hankie and Thimble in school. No one else in my family notices that I couldn’t care less about that except for Granddaddy – a veteran of the War Between the States and the smartest man I know. He secretly gave me his personal copy of Mr. Darwin’s book! (I’ve had to read the first chapter several times to understand anything.) I keep a Notebook of my observations. And I observe everything, especially if it flies, swims, scurries or camouflages itself.

The book is The Evolution of Calpurnia Tate, by Jacqueline Kelly and although I’m only a few chapters into it, I am mesmerized. I don’t read children’s book often even though I want to. This book was recommended by one of our librarian’s at work and it appealed to me because of my interest in historical fiction and courageous children. I am not disappointed. This book engaged me quickly and my mind locked on to the same captivating focus that happened constantly when I was a much younger reader. A good storyteller does that (as did William Zinsser in On Writing Well, which I recently finished).

When I’m captured by a book, not compelled to check the time, disgruntled to do a task and happy to return to my reading, it is bliss. I will not answer the phone, the dishes will sit, no one will see the unmade bed. I am in a state that deserves reinforcing by my attention.

There are innumerable books that provide this form of meditation. My indulgence in this young reader’s book is pure enjoyment. My book, my coffee, my sofa and I am content as I return to Calpurnia.

Bicycles and Skill Building

I’m taking a bike maintenance class for 6 weeks (half-way through at this writing) and I’m surprised how little I know. No I’m not. I knew I didn’t know much about bikes, I just deluded myself that I knew more than I do because I can ride a bike without training wheels, I commute 14 miles from work if it’s not too cold, dark or wet (I live in Colorado so that’s about to end), I have a nifty helmet, and get where I want to go. I’ve just been lucky that I haven’t had a flat on my rides. I even own my own bike stand and pump. “The bike equipment of the rider dost not make thee a know-it-all”. Actually, I bought the stand in anticipation of this class because I wanted to be able to work on my own bike at home.

So the class. It’s taught by a salty, old-schooler who I believe knows everything there is to know about bikes. I think he might be giving us more info than we need but it’s all very interesting and I’m sure I’ll want these details at some point. I want to be proficient with the basics, then build from there. I tend to get overwhelmed with the details – not because they’re not useful or I don’t want to know this information – they are and I do. But I get stressed that I won’t remember it all. That I won’t be able to put it all together in a functional way. That I’m learning about limit screws and shifter cables but that I might not get my tire back on correctly after fixing a flat.

And so it goes with learning something new. Although the information in the class is not being sparsed out in the most organized fashion, people seem to be getting it, are asking questions and sharing stories. We’re having to prioritize the content and fit it into our particular learning styles. I enjoy classes because my mind gets to relax enough to take in the information but not so much to check out. I learn a lot from other students’ questions, often ones I wouldn’t think to ask myself. I like to be a part of the camaraderie that begins to form within the group after the ice breaks. And I love to learn.

I get bored easily and if I’m not actively engaged in something I feel the atrophy start to creep in. The down times are productive for allowing information to process in the sub-conscious, but mostly I need to be doing something that is stimulating. Once I’m comfortable with my skills I know it’s time to shift to the next level and/or bring in something else. This class came along at the right time for me. My mind and interest were ready and now the challenge will be to continue practicing these new skills.

When I learned to knit a few years ago, it came over me suddenly. Out of the blue, I had this strong need to learn to knit. My mind was ripe for this and I was practically addicted for a couple of years. Then the fever abated and now I knit like a normal person, say when there’s a lull in my schedule or I need a change from other activities. But that sudden burst of needing to knit was a great catapult onto the learning curve and provided the motivation to keep practicing this detailed and repetitive craft.

My desire to learn to work on my bike wasn’t quite that strong, but it was enough. It’s something I find useful and fun and provides a way to build a new skill. For me it’s important that I know how to take care it.

How do these interests find us? No one in my family knitted or provided inspiration (I found out much later that my Grandma knitted many years ago). I also love living simply, backpacking and wouldn’t own a car if it was given to me. These characteristics and I met on our own, with no help from anyone close to me. They just sounded like something I’d be into. Something to try and it went from there.

Trusting what catches our attention, following through on interests and being willing to move with the learning curve is powerful. It teaches us that we can do anything. We become empowered and move forward in life with our bag of tricks, wisdom and humility. We’ll always be learners.

And Now A Word From Our Sponsor – that’s me

Yes, it’s a Nomad Needles plug!

I make things and sell them and wanted to remind readers that my products make great gifts for the upcoming holidays – or anytime!

I value handmade items. I love the process, the creativity and being able to (partially) contribute to my livelihood the old-fashioned way.

I sell my knitted items through my Etsy shop – Nomad Needles. I have lots of very cool wrist warmers that are made from 100% wool as well as hats, scarves and other things. All items are knitted by me.

I’m working on a line of doggie capes that are not quite ready for the shop yet, but hopefully soon

Click on the Nomad Needles link to the upper left to be redirected to my Etsy shop.

Thank you!

Life’s Too Short For Just One Path (part II)

(part I is here)

Society is a mighty force. This force wants you to make a choice and stick with it. It does not care about your itchy, creative impulses to try new things. And it is not concerned about your niggling urge to venture beyond your comfort level because comfort level works for society. And if you do, society has a device to keep you in check: fear. Collectively we humans have created and reinforced this fear to the point where we (often) shut down any new inclination that veers off of our initial chosen course. I am not referring to the healthy fight or flight response to stress that has sustained our species for eons. I am referring to the learned fear we develop as we move into adulthood that keeps us locked into habits and resistant to try new things. It is the fear that you will be regarded by your peers as eccentric. Fear you will not find another job if you leave the one you have if you leave to explore something new. Fear your money will run out. Fear is society’s great motivator to keep you where you are. If fear wasn’t so effective why wouldn’t more people be following their dreams? Many people talk about it, some follow through. But most have cozied right into a groove from which they (think they) cannot extricate themselves.

Parental fear and expectation

I believe a common reason it’s hard to leave the path we’re on is a result of hand-me-down fear - buying into someone else’s illusions. When I was in college I was very unhappy for a couple years and felt strongly that I needed to quit, at least temporarily. My mother resisted this because she quit college after 2 years and did not go back. Thus, she was convinced (“afraid”) that if I quit I wouldn’t go back. Long story short, I did take a year off and when I returned to college I had new energy and focus and finished strong. I listened to my own intuition and did what I knew to be right for me despite my mother’s fears.

(I’ve had to fight a long line of hand-me-down fear so I have experience with this. I keep practicing.)

Keeping pace with peers

As we look at what our peers are doing it’s easy to think we should be doing the same thing or at least something similar. For me, when I see people locked down with a big mortgage and stressful jobs I feel a huge sense of relief that I am not in that position. But for others this seems attractive. I guess. Or they wouldn’t be trying to do the same thing. Right? Do people jump through these hoops to have the right thing to say at the reunion? Family events? Cocktail parties? Perhaps but I wouldn’t know since I avoid these situations if at all possible.

Satisfying your own needs and agenda

This is all that really matters. It is your life. No one else’s. What do you want to see when you look back? What do you want to have done and learned? If anyone disapproves they will get over it and even learn from and admire you. Or they’ll just tut-tut you for about 5 minutes in some gossipy way that makes them sound like they know better about your life than you. But you won’t know about this because you will be busy living your own authentic life. Way to go.

The fear will always be lurking to throw you off balance

That’s a given, so don’t worry about it. Your job is to learn to dance with it and use it to your advantage. “Oh look there’s that pesky fear again. Welcome. You will give me the energy I need to push through this next thing I’m going to do.” Call it what it is and move on. You have things to do.

Like…

Remembering what you wanted to do back when you dreamed of doing it. Setting new goals. Reading about what other people are doing or have done. Start Googling your interests and see what you find. (Matador is my latest venue for inspiration.)

You don’t have to do everything at once but today you can begin to move toward your new life by taking small steps – purging your possessions, paying off debt, quit spending on dumb stuff, saving, planning, gathering information, talking to people. Become OK with changing the plan.

Practice listening to your intuition and following your heart. Make adjustments as you go and be patient with yourself as you figure this out.

Finally – be bold about setting a new standard for yourself. Change the things you want to change and allow the small setbacks. Everything about setting out on a new path is an adventure. And you can have as many paths in life as you want. You just have to start.

Latest Thoughts On Minimizing

During the last few months I’ve been minimizing my things. Sometimes this will happen in a state of frenetic activity, as if I’m seeing my stuff for the first time and wondering how it got here and shooing it out of my existence as fast as possible.

Then I’ll hit a plateau where I think there’s really nothing else I want to get rid of, or I run out of energy or ideas. Things slow down, but not for long. Soon I’m taking another look from a different angle – hmm…I don’t really need to bake bread anymore and that big mixing bowl is a pain in the patootie to clean…maybe I’ll let it and the bread pans go. And then I’m off again analyzing all the things I don’t care about anymore that are sitting around not serving any purpose. Most recently it was the T.V., some planters and clothes. 

In the past I’ve mentioned the euphoria shoppers experience when they buy something, comparing it to the feeling I get when I move stuff out of my space. I’m thrilled and want to get rid of more. I’ve often thought of myself as one who lives simply but as I’ve gone through this process I’m humbled to realize I don’t live as simply as I think I do. Just because I don’t own a car doesn’t mean I don’t have full closets and doo-dads I never use. All that has changed, and to remind myself of my former semi-packratedness (?) I’ve kept a list of most things I’ve purged. This is important to me because the purging has been a gradual process over several months and it’s easy to think I really haven’t gotten rid of that much. But the list reminds me that, oh yes, I have. (I’ve not brought any new things into my home except food, personal items and 2 pairs of work pants a friend gave me.)

But an odd thing has occurred to me: the newness of purging wears off quickly, just like the excitement of a new purchase soon wears off.

Yes I love having more room everywhere. I love not having the clutter – physical, mental or visual. I will continue to cull my belongings as much as possible. But it’s interesting to me how quickly I get past the relief of absent items, even forgetting what used to be here, and adapt to my new open surroundings.

I have some theories:

• I never needed the thing to begin with and so never found much value in it.
• The item was needed and appreciated, but it served its purpose and its usefulness is now obsolete.
• Some things that were once deemed sentimental are not anymore. I’ve kept favorite pictures, some souvenirs my parents gave me and a very few gifts from friends. But I think they’ve forgotten they gave them to me so if/when I do pass them on I don’t thing it’ll be a big deal.
• I got tired of looking at these things - especially my plants. They’ve been adopted by plant people.
• I’m just not one to get or stay attached to stuff.

These reasons make sense to me, especially the last one. I have little appreciation for most inanimate objects outside of their usefulness, and their historical sentiment (I’m thinking of a partially, delicately-knitted bedspread my grandma started in the 40s that I am finishing).

I think it’s a good thing I don’t ruminate over all the stuff I’ve unloaded. Less mental clutter.

T.V. Update – 48 Hours Later

So perhaps I overreacted about the potential uncomfortableness of having the T.V. gone. It’s going to be just fine. I love the opened up area. The room is brighter since the set and table use to sit in front of the window. There is energetic space now. I noticed this when the fridge was gone too and it was something I did not anticipate: there is new kind of calm without the big box of wires and components taking up energy. Although I still may watch a DVD on my laptop occasionally, I expect my time to be more focused on creative activity – writing, reading and craftiness.

I might have to revisit the 100-thing challenge since I could be getting close to this magic number. Or not. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that I’m discovering what is essential to a satisfying life for me. It’s a process that is meaningful and I have no idea where it will end. So it continues.